Monday, December 29, 2014

Phony Comaraderie

This morning's email brought the following solicitation.

To

me

Hey Pascal,

I wanted to check in to see if you'll be able to contribute towards Heritage's million dollar goal by the December 31 deadline.

Blah, blah, blah, blah.

Blah, blah.

Blah, blah, and blah.
All my best,

Christie Fogarty
Director of Membership
The Heritage Foundation

P.S. The Heritage Foundation is a 501(c)(3) non-profit, so your gift by December 31 is tax-deductible.
Response:

Hey Christie (if that's your real name),

Your "Hey Pascal" greeting is the kind that I receive from buddies with whom I email back and forth regularly.

Am I now one of your buddy correspondents that this greeting seems appropriate?

It's been my experience that emails of this sort come from a mass mailing, and that yours is a one way email address that accepts no incoming
Bottom line: it's a waste of any recipient's time to respond to them as they would with any of their  buddies.

So, next time, don't even consider greeting me with you condescending "Hey" at the least. 
In fact, you may address me as Mr. Fervor. Make some attempt to begin on the right foot.

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